April Is The Cruelest Month!

wedding procession

“April is the cruelest month.” – T. S. Eliot

Yes, it is indeed for us. The above line is the most quoted phrase from a famous work of the American poet T. S. Eliot’s ‘The Waste Land’ in 1922. This particular phrase seems most befitting to the Indians, especially the Gujaratis.

When Eliot framed this phrase, he had had no idea that it might ever be used in this context after 92 years of its publication. He would have never imagined this phrase could well reflect the plight of some 6 crore Gujaratis. Matrimonially speaking, April is the cruelest month to an average adult living in Gujarat and the reason being the number of auspicious timings it holds for the weddings. The whole month witnesses ongoing noisy weddings in every developed or ignored corner of the state.

April is the cruelest as it brings with it the end of bachelorhood for thousands of adults who have preserved it since birth, under careful observation of parents. The only set of people feeling wonderful in this season marriages (or also known as massacre by some) is the business houses that thrive on weddings.

As soon as April begins, the wedding drums start beating in every street of cities or villages alike as if the FIFA World Cup has been won by Gujarat. This month is preferred also because it is the month of summer vacation. So all studious pupils and college goers have no excuse to miss the wedding of their distant uncle’s son or daughter. A wedding is hit only if all the invitees attend it. The bigger the number of people in a wedding is, the more successful the mission is considered accomplished by elders.

April encourages parents to lose their lives’ savings (on which there is no refund guaranteed for unsuccessful marriages). It is a matter of reputation for a parent to get his son (however stupid or jobless he may be) married in an even grander manner than all the relatives’ and neighbours’ sons.

However, April’s black magic does not seem to work effectively outside Gujarat. There are known (and infamous) examples like Rahul Gandhi and a long list of film stars who see no April in their lives. Some heavenly powers seem to have blessed (or cursed) them with the boons of eternal bachelorhood. To stress the lack of poetic justice in life, there are those who enjoy many Aprils in their lives; sometimes they get to marry as many times as the number of goals scored by Germany against the host Brazil in the semi final match.

This same damned April took most of my friend’s bachelorhood four years ago (along with mine too). April should be omitted from calendars henceforth.

(To read the poem: http://www.bartley.com/201/1.html)

(About T.S. Eliot : http://www.en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Waste_Land)

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